With Friends Like These......

Oh shit! Not again! For the sake of Allah, I cannot control these women! Grant me stones so I can throw these vile witches to hell!




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Now THAT (above) is a Jihadi nightmare. Women, boobs, guns - oh the humanity! If they thought that Pvt. England was awful for stacking them in a pyramid, I would love every Muslim to have the opportunity of this crowd as his last sight on earth. Wait. I want to slather the sumbitches in lard first, then see this.

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“That men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!” - William Shakespeare

Today is so good, I am taking a shot from the two point line....

“God save me from my friends - I can protect myself from my enemies.” - Proverb

Regarding yesterday's post, I contacted a misguided friend who is volunteering for Senator Barack "Che" Obama's campaign. She was appalled that whoever was in charge of campaign signs failed to use the "spell check" function on at least two, glaringly obvious occasions. In defense, she did mention they at least got three out of four words correct. With the lone vowels, after all, you have a one in five chance of getting it right. Bravo on the difficult word "have".

When I first saw this video, I thought it was a spoof.

Hold on to yer Grape Nuts......IT'S NOT!

Like, uh, ya know, for real.

Attention Senator McCain Headquarters: Stop wasting campaign funds on trying to make your candidate appear consistent, even-tempered or for that matter, sane. Invest it all in barelypolitical.com and start picking out the new curtains for 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Don't get me wrong - I would love to meet this girl, uh, Tiffany, Crystal, Candy, Brittany, er, oh yeah, Amber. Wait, what was her name again? I am sure we would have a wonderful time, and it would most certainly not involve discussing Aristotelean philosophy or more plebian subjects like the Heisenberg uncertainty principle. The Big Bang Theory would hopefully come up though. I can hear the shrieks from the radical feminazis now, and you rightfully should be angered - but not at me, otherwise you are just shooting the messenger.

I am a supporter of classical feminism, Planned Parenthood and numerous concerns of women of intellect. Ayn Rand is my heroine and my favorite author. From that, do not assume that I seek your approval, neither do I feel any need to qualify myself in any such category. My sister is an M.D. with twenty years' practice as a pediatrician. A century ago such an ambition, let alone reality, was almost impossible. True feminism was and still is a valid movement, but not organizations like The Castration Coalition (can anyone get me a hyperlink for their website?) or women such as Andrea Dworkin (one look at that and you can sympathize with her anger). Various feminist organizations have almost always aligned themselves with the Democrat Party. Right now, the silence is deafening (there have been over 5 million hits for Obama Girl - don't tell me this has gone unnoticed). This woman is hopping around like some pole-dancing twat of a sex kitten. Is this a protrayal of the modern woman that "progressives" are comfortable with? Well, Gloria Steinem did eventually get married (to a man), thereby ending the debate over fish and bicycles. I can tell you one thing for certain - if any Republican had such an endorsement, official or otherwise, the Democrats along with their fifth column, the fourth estate, would be howling chastity raped.

I have two quotes for today because here comes yet another "unexpected" voice of support for Barack Hussein Obama. Some sort of US-Islamic forum has voiced their support for the Illinois Senator. Just how some scantily clad, silcone stuffed bimbo and a bunch of mysogynistic theocrats make for good bedfellows is beyond me, but I did see an SUV with an Al Gore sticker on it years ago, so stranger things have happened. These people hate us for our mere existence, love our money, and are either actively trying to destroy us or conveniently ignoring every instance of aggression towards the West. I have yet to hear C.A.I.R. condemn ONE act of Islamic terrorism. Please inform me when and if this ever happens. But what the hell, they like Obama.

Maybe this "hope and change" theme of Obama is just a universal blanket for anything goes. He has yet to give details on one plank, let alone a platform on which he is running. Perhaps he might send some campaign staffers to Home Depot, get some lumber and throw SOMETHING together.

People hope for change for a lot of things. The Muslim world hopes that the United States changes into a nuclear wasteland. I hope for a change that Amber Lee Ettinger appears in my bedroom this evening.

Senator, tell her to remember to bring beer and pizza.

Blog note: As an update to the previous post, A Hard Pill to Swallow, it is interesting that both Air Canada and Cubana have a country buttload (or a heaping shitload - whatever is the greater numerical value) of flights to and from Havana and all points Canada. Can somebody please, please make me eat crow and give me one, just ONE Canadian that goes to Cuba for their healthcare needs. After all, Micheal Moore told us that Cuba has fantastic healthcare. As you will discover, the Cubana link takes a while to load - given the advanced telecommunications technology of two tin cans and a string in "socialist paradise".

I Can't Make This Stuff Up

I just found this after posting today's entry. This is from an Obama rally. I will suggest the title "Dyslexics Untie for Omaba".

If you have a better idea, leave a comment. Meanwhile......

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“Politics is very much like taxes - everybody is against them, or everybody is for them as long as they don't apply to him” - Fiorello La Guardia

Short blog again. This article on the Commonwealth of Virginia says it all.

There is one thing I can add that produced many a guffaw at the hypocrisy of "progressives" (leftists no longer like being called 'liberals'; that's hate speech now, I guess) over the tax cuts for the "evil, putrid, vile rich" during the first Bush term. Every leftist celebrity, which means the overwhelming majority of the cult of narcissism, got on just about every afternoon television yackety-yack show to tell us all how much they a) thought George W Bush was stupid, b) also considered him an evil genious, c) thought these tax cuts were only for the "rich" and d) were going to show their compassion for the poor, pitiful poor by what charities they were going to give the sum and total of this hideous tax return to. Oprah, Rosie and company couldn't help but just fawn over what wonderful humanitarians these self-absorbed mental midgets were!

I had to point out two things of curiousity. First, if it were not for the unconscionable tax cuts, would they have denied these new-found charities the same contributions? Secondly, if the tax cuts are the root problem, then logically, they should not have shown their disdain with the idea by donating the funds to charities. Instead, to prove their point and retain some modicum of credibility and consistency of thought, they should have remitted the checks directly BACK to the U.S. Treasury department, since the theory behind their opposition is that the government knows better what to do with that money than the individuals who actually earned it.

I do not recall one of them returning the "undeserved" funds for which they felt so much guilt. But hey, it availed them the opportunity to look oh-so-generous and take a swipe at fiscal conservatism simultaneously.

And completely unrelated, aren't we all supposed to be poisoned with dangerous arsenic levels in our drinking water by now?

President's Day

"There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism. The one absolutely certain way of bringing this nation to ruin, of preventing all possibility of its continuing to be a nation of all, would be to permit it to become a tangle of squabbling nationalities." - Teddy Roosevelt

Hmm. A psychic president? One thing is for sure, if a president today, or any holder of elected office for that matter, uttered these words, impeachment proceedings and possible "hate crime" criminal action would ensue. Every victicrat in the nation would be marching, rioting and looting in the streets. Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton would immediately come to the rescue. Political experts such as Rosie O'Donnell, Barbara Streisand, Sean Penn and the Dixie Chicks would champion this cause celebre. It could very well be the end of Western civilization.

The insult to injury would be that it would only prove our 26th president correct.

During the door-to-door, federal government pester-thon known as the 2000 census, I responded to the questions that the government was legally entitled to know: Who am I and how many people reside in my household. When the poor census woman asked my ethnicity, I responded "Native-American". She asked, perplexedly, "Native-American?", apparently because I did not live in a teepee, own a casino, and my feather headress was off at the cleaners that day. I remarked with pride, "Yes - I was born in Louisville. What am I, a potted plant?" and shut the door.

Names are everything on the passing scene. Although we are supposed to be a nation of equal justice under the law, put some discriminating adjective followed by a hyphen and suddenly you are more equal than others. This is seldom done out of pride of one's lineage, but more often to denote some sort of victimized status to rally around and garner sympathy from the political, media and fourth estate classes. The aforementioned foster the "soft bigotry of low expectations" out of "compassion", or so they say. In actuality, they are more prejudiced than the grand wizard insofar as referring to Barack Obama as "articulate" - how the hell is a Harvard educated man supposed to express himself? Grunts, shrieks and vulgar hand gestures? You would think that the Illinois senator was an anomaly like a kangaroo with a PhD in differential calculus.

Hyphenated Americanism has it's advantages. If you qualify, you are automatically afforded two avenues of privelige both socially and legally. First, like the rest of us less fortunate, unhyphenated slobs, you can take the route of being an individual with the same rights as everybody else. When that doesn't work, you can trump everything with your group identity. Muslim immigrants in Europe have picked up on this quickly, and are following in the United States. When they don't get their way, the results are often lethal.

It seems to be infectious even by those who see it's stupidity and danger. Even though postings to this blog can be anonymous, nobody has yet to respond with a hilarious scenario to the murder in Houston. We are tripping over ourselves not to offended the "sensitivities" of basically groups of people that hate the rest of us anyway. This political correctness nonsense will eventually get us all killed and/or be the end of the most advanced culture in history.

Now go report me for a "hate crime" and petition the government to chisel Roosevelt off the face of Mount Rushmore, lest someone be "offended".

Buying a Stairway to Heaven

“If you have a particular faith or religion, that is good. But you can survive without it.” - The Dalai Lama

OK. It's Sunday again, and the category is weirdness among "christians" (I use quotations out of intent and for good reason). I happen to be a Christian, not that its anybody's business, but a heap of people out there seem to have this insatiable need to make their business mine, so it's only polite that I reciprocate out of good manners.

There are a groups out there that are impervious to logic; among them are global warming cultists, The Flat Earth Society, people that buy Micheal Moore's horse squeeze, and religious zealots. You cannot reason with these people, and nothing makes them more hopping mad than ignoring them. However, I found a great deal. For $600 you can bother the crap out of people and have the certification to show it.

The Way of the Master, in just three days, promises to instruct you how to "seek and save the lost the way Jesus did." Airfare is not included, but the hotel is (I guess they want all students of salvation staying in one place, just in case ol' Scratch comes around). Upon closer examination, a lot of time is spent on "street evangelism and open-air preaching". I don't know about you, but in any major city it is not hard to find "street evangelists" out making fools of themselves and disturbing what is left of the peace. I am willing to bet the rent that the overwhelming majority of them did not have to spend six hundred bucks to do it either. The First Amendment guarantees them all the credentials necessary for this profession. If your really want to see "street evangelism" en masse, just wait until the next Harry Potter book comes out or Marilyn Manson comes to town. You will get "evangelized" whether you like it or not.

Jesus Christ is about the most famous person ever in history. Considering the man only spent three of his thirty-three years on earth in his ministry, that is not small communion wafers. If Muslims wouldn't get so worked up over images of Mohammed and let people actually have a face to go with the name, perhaps their advertising campaign would be more successful. At least they wouldn't have to threaten people with death in order to convert them.

What gets me is the six hundred bucks. Jesus convinced twelve people not only to drop everything they were doing, but to follow him around for FREE. That was one heck of a sales pitch. I must also say it remains successful 2000 years later. I happen to be a customer. Alright, maybe not the best customer, since I am Episcopalian. I was only made aware of this while minding my own business outside, you guessed it, a rock concert (Nine Inch Nails in particular) and wearing a tee shirt with the Episcopalian shield on it. There must have been some defect in the printing of this particular shield, since it failed to protect me from being accosted by a "street evangelist" overly concerned about the condition of my salvation. "You know you goin' to 'hale' if you keep goin' to that fag church.", the fellow said. I looked at him after a pregnant pause and responded "May the Lord be with you too", and walked away amidst the screechings of many a chapter and verse from this guy.

Jesus hung out with prostitutes, thieves (tax collectors), women (gasp) and the poor. I don't think I have the patience or the stomach for an IRS agent, but since I am doomed to hell eternal for being Episcopalian, I guess I will hang out with other people on their way there too, even if it means having to change flights in Atlanta. Better than going to a Heaven crowded with people like this.

Saturday Night Special

“Poverty may be the mother of crime, but lack of good sense is the father” - Jean de la Bruyere

Houston, we have a problem.

If you think New Orleans is tired of crime, Houston has a case of insomnia from it. Given the cities' close proximity to each other, Houston took in a lot of Katrina refugees, and got a whole lot more than they bargained for. Since no good deed goes unpunished, now many of their "guests" have long overstayed their welcome, and they refuse to leave, among refusing to do a lot of other things. As opposed to their former haunts in the Crescent City (which is being rebuilt so they can tear it up all over again), Houston must have a lot of low hanging fruit.

So here is just one of last night's free-for-alls in Houston. Instead of waxing poetically on this story, I think some creative writing by the readers is in order. Your theories should include the following:

1. What were Cedric and Maxie doing up at 3 a.m.?

2. Just exactly what was their relationship? Business, friends, relatives, acquaintances, enemies, members of the Rotary Club, complete strangers?

3. What egregious transgression prompted Cedric to whack Maxie?

4. How more leftist handgun control laws could prevent something like this from happening in the future.

5. And finally, make up some politically correct excuse that exonerates Cedric as the real victim of this and somehow blame it on the Bush administration - George W. is from Texas too, after all.

All entries will be evaluated by next Saturday, along with another interesting case for us to noodle out. Until then, go to bed at a decent hour, and don't get shot.